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I’ve heard a lot of guys talk or complain about dating single moms...completely understandable! And being one it has caught my attention. Here’s reasons why it’s hard to date a single mom.
1. You fall in love with her kids.
I hear this over and over again. The problem is when/if you break up, you still love those kids, but have no ties to them. I’ve seen relationships from 3 to 8 years where the guys will never see the kids again. And it’s not fair to the man or the kids. It’s a risk.
2. You will never be number one. Ever!.
Her kids will come first every single time. Or they should. And if they don’t? You don’t have a good woman.
3. She’s busy! Really busy!
Most single mom’s have 2 full-time jobs. When they aren’t at work they are out at soccer games, dance or music classes, or parent-teacher conferences, and don't even get me started with the mom’s who are still in school themselves. A single mom does it all, apart from professional full time job, she has kids - home - courses - school to care! there’s no shifts, no breathing that comes in at the end of the day, however late. If the night is sleepless due to a fever, teething or something unexplained then the morning rolls on regardless. This can happen night after night with no relief, that’s just the way it is! Finding time to fit in a relationship can be the last thing in her mind!
4. In good situations there’s a baby daddy.
This one is hard to admit, but it’s true. As long as the father is still a part of the child’s life you will have to deal with him! And it’s not always a bad thing, in fact it shouldn’t be, but it’s a factor when men are thinking about dating a woman with a child.
5. Hello to a world of responsibility.
If you have your own kids or not you are taking on the responsibility of being a good role model for this woman’s children. Doesn’t matter if the baby’s dad is in the picture or not. When you are with her and her kids you need to be responsible. You need to be a father figure.
6. It’s hard.
Relationships are hard. They say to have a healthy marriage to wait a year before having children. Now take that and date a woman who already has kids? You are looking at an even more complicated relationship with responsibility that in the beginning a normal couple doesn’t share. Those spontaneous, romantic dates? you can forget at time!
But here’s the thing. It can also be really rewarding. Because dating a woman with children opens your eyes to what a wonderful woman she is.
Here is reasons Why Dating A Single Mom Is Actually Awesome!
There's nothing sexier than a chic who can look after herself, her home, her finances, cook a mean meal and still give her children everything they deserve!
I appreciate the concept of being desired and accepted. Yes, I’m a mom of two girls (15 & 11 years old), been single mom 7 years now. In between I've had two serious long-term relationships of 2 years each that I had to let go knowing that it was not good enough and not what I was looking for. I like sex and wine and a perfect steak. Sometimes I like to run. I’m also a working professional full time, and running 3 home businesses for extra income. However, being a mom has contributed most to developing the sexiest parts of my single self. Along the way, I’ve gotten to know enough other moms to offer a bit of advice on why dating a single/divorced mom could lead to your best relationship ever – plus, a few tips on how to make it even hotter.
1. There’s no time or purpose for relationship games.
A single mom spends her time earning money and taking care of her kids & people. Her life focuses on making sure everyone has what is needed, before it’s needed. She doesn’t have time to play games with you about whose turn it is to call or depending on you. She’s perfectly capable of taking care of everything in the relationship, but that’s exhausting on top of all her other responsibilities. She’s probably dreaming of a man who won’t let her do it all.
TIP + REWARD: Take the initiative. Make the first contact. Don’t make her guess about whether you want to see her, or when you’ll be together next. Help to plan dates. If you screw up, own it, apologize, and offer a solution. She’s a natural caregiver, but you have to earn your place in her life. Relieve her of typical dating frustrations and she’ll focus on showering you with the love and attention she gives to the other VIPs in her life.
2. When marriage leads to babies and (not much) vanilla sex, being single again is sexually liberating. Long-term relationships and marriage sometimes lead to routine and boredom. Lack of communication is also a major contributor to broken relationships. You can bet that any failed marriage probably had some failure in the bedroom too. If she didn’t feel loved by her previous partner, he didn’t ask her what she liked in a way that made her feel safe and supported sexually, then she’ll be expecting better from her next serious relationship. You have a huge opportunity for a LOT of fun as her next partner.
TIP + REWARD: Ask about her sexual fantasies. She’s probably more willing now to talk about and act on fantasies she didn’t get to in her previous relationship. If she’s been dating for a while, she may have already explored a few! Continue to encourage her to speak up about what she likes and it’s unlikely you’ll ever be bored in the bedroom, or outside, or wherever your fantasies lead!
3. Biological clocks don’t matter anymore. Don’t you hate when you start dating a girl and she immediately fast-forwards to marriage and babies? Not a problem with a single/divorced mom who already knows the wonderful challenge kids can be. What single moms want is a confident guy and great sex that does NOT lead to a baby!
TIP + REWARD: Some single or divorced moms would love to meet a new partner and continue to grow their family, but it’s not for everyone. She might offer to introduce you to her kids, you may never meet them, or it may not happen for a very long time. Find out whether your needs and expectations match about raising a family. Finally, you can enjoy a relationship that isn’t based on a ticking clock.
4. Single moms have developed desirable qualities of successful women. She’s ambitious, able to manage multiple tasks simultaneously, is both routine-driven and able to adapt to the unexpected. She is able to balance earning a living with being available to her family. This is a woman who has risked her own life one time (or more) for the life of a complete stranger. She volunteers her time and attention in a variety of capacities, and consistently accepts new responsibilities with little to no training. She’s incredibly loyal, even when faced with personal loss or heart-ache.
TIP + REWARD: She doesn’t need you to take care of her or her kids and it’s unlikely she’d let you try anyhow. What she needs is a man who shows equal abilities on other fronts. Show her your own strengths and how you can contribute in your own unique way to a balanced partnership.
Single/divorced moms are direct when dating, sexually adventurous, have well-developed life skills, and aren’t forcing a biological timeline.
Bad side of this, after a failed relationship/marriage, and take-over full responsibility of being a mom/a dad and everything that her kids could ever need, it is pretty easy for her to leave a relationship that doesn't give her full satisfaction and security more than she already have without you!
They don't take time to put up with unpromising/unclear relationships nor dealing with your extended family issues or approval, they don't mind to be alone, as they know best what long-term happiness and what's not. All they need is a man with "big balls" to make her feel special and loved.
If she has a job, her own car, pays her own bills and manages to live comfortably BEFORE she meets you, UNDERSTANDS that she wants you, your presence & your loyalty! not your money. She can finance herself and her children!