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An example of letting go, find a time in your life when you actively resisted something. Then, for whatever reason, you stopped the resisting and said, “The heck with it.” You stopped fighting your situation and moved on with your life.
Notice what happened the moment you did this. You got your peace of mind back. The fear and upset disappeared. You also saw everything differently. Everything looked different because the tunnel vision was gone. Instead of having 3 degrees of possibility, you now had 360 degrees.
Now notice what happened to the area of life that you were resisting. It started clearing up. Life always takes care of itself when we get our egos out of the way.
Fear is a state of mind and is created by resisting a future event. Example, if you have a fear of losing someone, you are resisting the future event called, “losing the person.” The more you resist losing the person, the bigger your fear. The bigger your fear, the more you feel threatened. The more you feel threatened, the more you hang on and push the person away. By resisting the future event, you make the fear come true.
To have any fear lose its power, do the opposite of what creates it. Instead of resisting the future event, be willing for the fear to come true – not in your actions, but in your heart. In your actions, do everything you can to make sure it doesn’t happen, but in your heart, be willing.
The moment you become willing for your fear to come true, the fear loses power. You restore your ability to see clearly and this area of life starts clearing up.
My step of Letting Go are:
1. Trusting.
Trust that you will be okay no matter what happens. Even if your greatest fears come true, know that when the smoke clears, you will be fine. When you know that you will be okay no matter what happens, letting go becomes relatively easy.
The more you trust, the more you are able to let go, and the more life turns out okay. This in turn reinforces trusting. When you don't trust, you fight, resist, hang on, and withdraw. This makes everything worse, which reinforces "don't trust."
Ultimately, trust is a choice. It’s something you create. It's a declaration. "I will be okay no matter what happens. I trust, just because I say so." You have had tough times before and you have made it through every one of them. If you are in a tough time now, this too will pass. Life is only threatening when you resist. So stop resisting and trust.
If you are engaged in your spirituality, a powerful way to let go of resisting and hanging on is to give your situation to God. Problem areas seems to clear up when you do this.
2. Be in the moment.
When your thoughts are spinning out of control, chances are, you're dwelling on something that happened in the past - or you're obsessing over something that has yet to happen. The key to stopping those thoughts in their tracks is to be aware of the present moment. Noticing what's happening right now necessarily yanks your thoughts out of those dark corners. It sounds so simple, but as you probably know, it's not always easy to do. Here are a few ways to become more aware of what's happening right this second:
- If you look at a calming image, the mind can relax and let go all on its own, but it only happens when you stop trying and expecting it to happen. This is a good primary method to relax and calm the mind.
3. Engage with the world around you.
Part of the downside of dwelling on negative memories or emotions is that you're forced to be a little distant from what's going on outside your head. When you consciously decide that you're going to come out of your shell and engage with the world, you leave less room in your mind for those niggling thoughts and feelings that normally sap your mental energy. By judging yourself on the theme of those thoughts it can actually make the problem harder to deal with. You might have been thinking about how much you don't like someone then feel guilty or angry for it. This then trains the mind to become habitual or ingrained as a cause and effect process and it becomes harder in future to be in control. Here are a few ways to start engaging on a basic level:
- Be a better listener during conversations. Take time to really absorb what the other person is telling you, instead of half-listening while you worry about other things. Ask questions, share advice, and generally be a good conversationalist.
- Consider doing something new that you've always wanted to do, this will shift your mind instantly!
- Look at where you're standing right this moment! Pay attention to where you're sitting. Be attuned to your immediate surroundings. Your reality is where you are right now. It's impossible to go back to yesterday, and it's impossible to predict what will happen tomorrow. Keep your thoughts engaged with your physical presence in the current moment.
- Say something mentally or out loud. The physical act of making a sound will pull your thoughts to the present. Say "This is the present," or "I am here." Repeat it until your thoughts are pulled to the present.
- Go outside. Changing your immediate environment can help your thoughts move back to the present as your senses are occupied with expanding to take in more data. Observe the way is the world is moving around you, each being living in his or her own present. Focus on small changes, like a bird alighting or a leaf whirling on the sidewalk.
When I practice these, I find inner peace in me, massive confidence boosting, I feel more productive and my creative mind shooting like no tomorrow and I feel fearless and happy, excited for things that I can't even see it yet.
Magic start to happen when I tune into that feelings...everything I ever wish for came true slowly and obvious! all that I was fear and resisted of, once I let go..all of sudden started to show up in my experience just the way I wanted to be! life always work mysterious on me!